Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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