When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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