During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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