these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
