I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Randomize