you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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