If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
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