No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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