SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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