I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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