C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
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they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
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Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
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