I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
