we have pet lesbian snakes
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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