Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
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This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
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Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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