That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
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Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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