There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize