Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
