Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I can feel your judgement through the phone
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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