So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
how does that bad decision feel?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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