i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize