Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
