you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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