why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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