he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
