Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize