I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
