What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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