I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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