So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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