Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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