sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize