12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Randomize
