Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The feeling are messing with the penis
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
