A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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