WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
