How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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