Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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