How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
