dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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