The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
