Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize