Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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