he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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