That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
