I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize