Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
