My room smells like vodka and shame
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
