Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
