I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
