So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
